I used to care so much about dating. Everyone around me was in a relationship, and I felt like I was the one left out. I mean, the majority of my friends are dating, engaged, or married- yet, I’m sitting here, on a Friday night, alone, blogging about my singleness. So yeah, there’s that.
I wanted to be in a relationship because that’s what the world says will make me happy, and since I haven’t been truly happy in a really long time, I searched for it. I will admit I searched for happiness in guys. Did I find it? No. All I found was heartbreak when the guys turned out to be not who I thought they were. It lead to me feeling like something was wrong with me because they disappeared. It lead me to feeling like I needed to become someone I wasn’t.
Society tells us that being 21 and single is abnormal.
Society tells us that not having a ring on your left hand in your twenties means you’re wasting your life away.
Society tells us that settling is okay because there’s a timeline for love.
Society tells us that if we’re single in our thirties then we must have too high of standards.
Society has it wrong.
It’s completely normal to be single at 21.
It’s completely fine to not be engaged by a certain age.
There’s no timeline for love. God didn’t create one. He created you. He created the person that is meant to be your forever. He created the time you’ll meet them. He created the place. He decided the date. He decided when, where and how. Love doesn’t fit to societies timeline, it’s on God’s time.
So maybe you’re 17, and never had a boyfriend, or 42, and single. It’s okay. Don’t settle.
I remember this guy I went on a date with, and I really liked him. But there were some things I knew he did that went against all my beliefs, and I knew it went against the standards I had for a Godly relationship, but I wanted to date him, so I pushed away those second-thoughts that kept creeping in. I told myself that I was just too picky, and I needed to lower my standards. I knew what I was deciding was wrong. I knew that, but there was so much pressure in society and being single in my twenties isn’t normal, so I pushed my feelings to the side.
Society is so wrong. Long story short, things didn’t continue with that guy, but not because I didn’t want to. So, looking back, I know if it was up to me, I would have chosen to lower my standards because I felt like I needed to be in a relationship. I was so wrong.
You don’t need to be in a relationship. A guy cannot validate your worth. A guy cannot provide what you’re searching for, even if the world says he can, and even if he does for some time, it won’t last.
I haven’t met my Prince Charming, and I don’t know when I will. But I do know that I’m not going to settle for just any guy, because the world says I shouldn’t be 21 and single. I know the man that God created for me is amazing, and I know He is going to be worth the wait. Settling isn’t an option when it comes to a Godly relationship. Settling is putting your trust in the world, and not in God. Settling is telling God He’s taking too long to send Prince Charming. Settling will send you down a road of heartache. Maybe not at first, but down the line it will turn the corner and heartache will happen.
Avoid. Avoid the pain. Trust in God’s timing. Don’t settle because society says that you’re being too picky. Don’t settle because the world says you should be engaged by now. Don’t settle.
Wait on God, and whether you’re 21, or 43 when it happens, you’ll be happy you waited for the man of your dreams.