Tomorrow marks three years since I had my first heart surgery. I actually had two that day. I went in for a heart catheterization, and a hopeful ablation. I left with a heart catheterization, and then a second procedure to implant a loop recorder. Tomorrow marks three years since I found out firsthand that doctors can’t fix everything, no matter how many medical advancements there are. That a 99.9% success rate means nothing when you’re that .1%. I learned how it would feel to wake up from a surgery, so hopeful, and then to have your dreams crushed by a nurse that tells you it did not work but that there is…
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Things I’ve learned about Motherhood.
I love being a mama. I always dreamed of motherhood. I never imagined the choices I would have to make in order to carry a child. I never knew how hard just daily life would be keeping up with an [almost] toddler, and my heart. Although motherhood isn’t easy all the time, it’s been an amazing journey, and I’m so THANKFUL to have the opportunity to celebrate my first Mother’s Day on Sunday. I’m new to the motherhood tribe, but I’ve learned a few things. You are meant to be their mom. No matter how many times you ‘think’ you failed them- you didn’t. God placed you as their mama…
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You are enough for motherhood.
I used to dream of being a mom. I could not wait to embark on that journey. But then my journey with a chronic illness began. I was 18, in college, and single, so I never thought much of my future as a mom. I then started dating, and the thought of being a mom would come and go from my mind. I’d ask myself if I even thought it would be possible. I considered all my options- adoption, surrogacy, and pregnancy. I knew ultimately I wanted to be a mom no matter how that came about, but I really desired to carry my own child. A few years into…
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A little honesty.
Being a mom has been amazing, and I am so blessed to have my son in my life. The love I have for him is indescribable. A few years ago I wasn’t sure if I’d ever be able to carry a baby, or have the energy to be a mom. I was at a very low time in my life emotionally, and physically. My body felt like it was failing me. Doctor appointments, medications, and the right treatment got me to a good place where I felt like I could make my dream to be a mom a reality. We planned our precious baby. The first month was easy. The…
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Our story choosing life.
October 3, I saw two pink lines. I was excited, and scared. Scared because I knew the risks that would come. My baby was no surprise, yet he was planned- by us, and by God. I knew the hardship that I would go through. I had a hard time finding an OB that would accept me. Even after finding an OB that would accept me, they didn’t want to accept my baby’s life with the same value as my own. To me, my child was not a clump of cells, but he was a human- my precious baby. It was the hardest nine months of my life. I tried to…
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Lessons from my first year of marriage.
Tomorrow is one year since I married my best friend. I’ve learned a lot of things in this past year. I’ve learned that when they say “marry your best friend“, you should take that seriously. I know what it’s like to be mixed with the wrong people, and I can tell you that being in a relationship with the right person is amazing. Being able to wake up next to your favorite person is something worth waiting for. I’ve learned the importance in finding someone that truly loves you. A person that loves you when you’re mad. A person that loves you when you’re happy, and sad. A person that…
